Mission Impossible

I’m in need of 4 passport size photos. So this morning, I carefully redrew my face with makeup, moussed up my hair and hurriedly headed out to get some pictures taken before my face started to melt and get some cat food on my way back. That wouldn’t take 20 minutes, right?

Around quarter to noon, I head to a Rite Aid to the west of my house. When they are about to take the picture, I remember, fortunately, that I’ve left my purse at home. Get back home. Take the purse and head out to Wallmart to the east of my house cause it’s too embarrassing to go back to the same place. Upon finding the photo department, I’m told that they do not take pictures. But the friendly but professional employee directs me to another Rite Aid further east. Drive further east to Rite Aid and upon walking around the whole place, I find out they don’t even have a photo department. But it might be hiding. So I ask somebody where it is. They don’t have it. I get back in my car and while waiting to turn left out of the parking lot, I see a sign right across the street that reads “1 Hour Passport Photo.” Relieved, I drive over. Upon reaching the store, I find out the store is closed and the place is for rent. Becoming increasingly anxious to get the picture taken before my temporarily-not-unpleasant face starts to melt, I get back to my car and drive west to find CVS right around the first Rite Aid. They not only have the photo department and take passport pictures, it only takes 5 minutes. Delighted that I’ve finally gotten this picture business over with, I eagerly examine the pictures in the envelope once I’m back in my car and find 6 pictures of my face most definitely NOT “not-unpleasant.” Every single one of them has the mug shot quality to it. With heavy heart, I start driving back east towards cat food store and I’m pleasantly surprised at the sight of Walgreens. How did I miss that? Happily, I turn my car around in hopes of getting pictures with the quality slightly better than that of mug shots. But if I still look like shit in them, I won’t get another set because it means I do look like shit and more picture-taking won’t solve that problem. So I don’t even look inside the envelope this time, and drive back home, satisfied to check off the mission accomplished. After some poop scooping duty, I check out the pictures and am pleased with non-mug-shot-like quality. Since I’m holding the glossy paper with 2 pictures on it, I look inside the envelope to find nothing else. I call the store and am assured that if I show up today, I’d be able to get more prints. Anxious to get this over with, I immediately drive over there to find myself staring at the guy telling me that he would call me when the prints are ready because another job is printing more than 300 prints. Why couldn’t he just get my info over the phone, get the prints, and then call me in the first place? I drive back home and look at the time, it’s 3:17pm.

After running around for three and a half hours, the four passport photo mission is still not accomplished. Walgreens people haven’t called me yet and I’m exhausted beyond belief. And have you noticed that there hasn’t been any mention of me actually getting the cat food?