If you are one of my friends who read this blog regularly, you know I’ve been preoccupied with food lately. But just in case you still don’t get how much important food is to me,  my Thursday 13 post is about food. Again. Sorry. The following list consists of thirteen tell tale signs that food rules my life.

1. As I made it clear a few days ago in The Lunch Factor post, the thought of lunch gets me out of bed every morning.

2. When I have some work to do in the data center at the headquarters, which is about 10 minutes from my office, I check the headquarters’ cafeteria weekly menu online to decide which day I’d mosey on over there.

3. To decide which day I should take my comp day for working on a weekend or at night, I consult both the headquarters’ cafeteria menu and the Japanese food menu referred to in The Lunch Factor post.

4. The first thing I do in the morning after the computer has been powered up at work is to check the cafeteria  and Japanese food menu item (again refer to The Lunch Factor post) for the next day’s lunch, and make the order for Japanese food if necessary.

5. When trying to make the said order above, if I cannot put my order in because the spread sheet is locked by somebody for longer than 5 minutes,  way waayyyy more than generous time enough for anybody to put one’s name and the order in, the offender gets a nasty email.

6. When my friends are trying to entice me to come to a get together or a holiday dinner, the first thing they tell me is rarely the location or the time or who’s coming, but what I will be eating.

7. The number one reason I am not taking free online classes, offered by an OS software vendor, which I’m allowed to take during work hours, is because the classes start at 11am and ends at 3pm WITHOUT a lunch break. What kind of dumb fuck schedules classes like that? People’s gotta eat, man!

8. Although I’ve seen 3 people in my adult life who could eat more than I do, I have never had a friend who could eat more and faster than I do in one sitting, and that includes 6ft tall 300+lb guys. OK, this sounds like some odd kind of bragging in a twisted way, but hey, it is what it is.

9. People who I just met often mistake me for being very quiet and reserved if we happen to be eating because I’m usually too busy stuffing myself with food to converse.

10. When people ask me where they should go during their visit to NYC, I gladly share in detail the names and the locations of numerous restaurants and my favorite menu item from each until I’m awkwardly interrupted by some remarks like they meant sightseeing and places to visit and such, not the eateries. (Well, I guess I should say I “used to” because NYC hasn’t been my hangout for about 5 years and so I can’t really give recommendations now.)

11. In the beginning of this year, I stopped going to the weekly departmental change control meeting which I had faithfully attended for several years. In the beginning of this year, “coincidentally,” they stopped serving donuts in the said meeting.

12. I  make sure to empty my bowels and wear clothes with elastic waist before going to a buffet or rodizio.

13. I really do eat anything. Moldy food is still food.

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