I got this catnip bed from a wonderful lady who runs a cat rescue called Beach Cat Rescue, which is non-profit. She and her husband fund the rescue efforts with the profits from selling pet beds, wooden signs, shadow boxes, etc, all handmade. I have 3 of these catnip beds, and when I got them, the amount of pleasure Grizzley displayed was just priceless – rubbing against it, drooling on it, purring until my entire neighborhood felt the vibrations, guarding the bed by growling and whacking at the dogs. Now Grizzley enjoys having 3 favorite spots to curl up and purr. These are very well made beds with very strong catnip inside, and can be ordered from her Etsy store and her eCrator store. They make wonderful gifts for cat people and help rescue abandoned cats, and best of all, they make the cats happy.
Last night I was looking for something, and came upon a package that was buried underneath some junk. After inspecting the address labels, I still couldn’t determine what could be inside even though I recognized the sender as an online store called Knock Knock, a place which I visit very often usually just to go through the slide shows of their products for fun. I bought fun things from this place before, but never out of necessity, so I had to open the package to find out what I might have ordered a while back and totally erased it from my memory.
It turned out to be 3 books from “The Self-Hurt Series”. I started reading the book titled How To Have An Ill-Behaved Dog (make sure you click on the view slide show link to see what the book looks like). I’m on page 41 right now, and it has been an eye-openning experience. Basically, this book is no nonsense very straightforward How-To guide to make your dog as ill-behaved as possible. From the cover of the book:
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO THE DOG PARK AND wondered, “how do those people achieve such ill-behaved dogs?” Or perhaps you’re thinking about adopting a canine companion and want to start off on the right paw. Whether you’re experienced or new at the pet game, this book will teach you the most innovative techniques for cultivating a dog who doesn’t listen, barks incessantly, and destroys your shoes.
LEARN HOW TO:
Encourage your dog to eat off the counter and beg for table scraps
Develop your dog into a narcissistic extension of your self
Make sure your dog jumps on all visitors
Harness your dog’s natural drives to extract the worst possible behavior with the minimum of effort
My dogs do not need much help in becoming a high level IBDs (Ill-Behaved Dogs), especially Foster. But with the help of this book, I hope I could get him to master most ill behaviors in no time. I say “most” not “all” because he’s at a somewhat disadvantage because he’s been neutered, which is a big no no for cultivating some certain very important ill behaviors.
I’ll report back on this book after I finish it. The other two books are called How To Get Fat and How To Drive Like A Maniac. I know I know I don’t need any such how-to books since I already mastered the arts in both areas and I could probably have written those books myself, but I’d like to know what methods other people use and I’m always willing to learn from others. I’ll also write reviews of these books when I finish reading them.
Today, I received the 8GB USB Flash Drive that I ordered last week for $28.99 with S&H free. I remember the time when I bought my first PC with 100MB of hard disk for around $5,000 AND it made my friends so envious because how could I possibly use up all that 100MB of disk space???
Today, I experienced one of those moments. You know those moments in which you look at something you see every single day, which you never think about why or whatsoever about, and suddenly one day you see the said something and go HUH? You know what I’m talking about.
I was looking for something in my usually bottomless pit of a coat pocket, where I can never find anything. I took the keys out to make it easier for my hand to maneuver, and that moment came.
Why do I have so many keys? I forgot everything about why I took the keys out in the first place and was utterly mesmerized by my keys. And then I started examining each of them except three I use daily – one car key and two house keys. I recognized a key to my file cabinet at home and six store member cards – 2 Walbaum’s, 2 Stop&Shop, 1 Pathmark, 1 Petco, 1 Pet Supplies Plus. Why do I carry two of the same cards on the same keychain? Well, where do you suggest I put the second one then?
That leaves me with 9 keys that I don’t recognize. One of those could be for another file cabinet at home. So I’m left with 8 keys. No, it doesn’t look like I carry two of any key, I compared each of them. And for hours, I’ve been trying to think of something that I might need a key for, and I have nothing. I don’t even remember putting all these keys on my keychain. A uniquely shaped one in particular even looked very strange as if I just saw it for the first time. But do I dare toss them out? Do I?
I knew the answer even before I asked myself the question. You did, too, right? So after spending so much time on my keychain mystery, I gained nothing…. Not only that, I’m writing a friggin blog about it. Why? Not a clue.
I have been gaining a lot of weight for a couple of years. I don’t know how much I weigh because I haven’t owned a bathroom scale since uh… who knows. I can’t even remember. But I do have some gray matter that says if I have to keep buying clothes one size up and up and up, and they keep getting tighter, that means I’m gaining weight. Well, ok, I’m getting fat fast and furious.
I don’t know why, really. I only eat until I’m full. If I’m not full, I eat a little more. Is there anything not right about that? It’s not my fault I have big appetites. Then there is this matter of not getting enough exercise. Well let me tell you something. I TRIED! But if you don’t have the time, then you don’t have the time! Make the time, you say, Oprah? Easy for you to say. I can’t afford to make the time. When I go home after work, I get to eat my dinner around 9:30pm if I’m lucky. I get only 5 or 6 hours of sleep. Tell me when I can friggin exercise! SHEESH!
Anyway getting back on track, around the beginning of this year – obviously, the resolution season, I was absolutely convinced that the reason I was getting fat was that I didn’t own a bathroom scale. So I got online, read the reviews, compared models for a couple of months and finally ordered this one from overstock.com. It’s being sold for $109.99 but I had some gift cards, so I paid $34.99 out of pocket. And the shiny brand spanking new bathroom scale arrived yesterday.
It looks so slick and smooth, it could very well be one of the best looking things in my place. How can I ever justify stepping on this gem of an instrument? This piece of equipment is supposed to tell me a shitload of things about my body. I’m so full of hope of losing weight. It’s going to just melt my fat away with its good looks, I’m sure of it. So I’ve decided to put it where I can see it and it can see me very often.
So the perfectly handsome bathroom scale has been in display on my coffee table basking in its soft silver glow. I’m very happy about this purchase and satisfied with the product. I highly recommend it.
Serious Stuff. Seriously
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